Do I Suffer From Writer's Butt?

June 20, 2015

It’s something every writer has to come to terms with at some point in life. Do I have writer’s butt?


In most cases you’ll find that the answer is yes. We have unknowingly become a little chunky.


Life as a writer means a lot of time at desk. In a chair, writing, thinking, procrastinating and if you’re like me, you might also have a day job that requires you to sit for long hours as well.  Writing, like most professions, comes with its shares of occupational hazards. There’s vision problems, carpal tunnel  addictions, and  Amazon-itis. Amazon-it is is the compulsive deed of checking of one’s Amazon rating, sales, competitors, and tacking kindle downloads. It’s almost an addiction. Then again, social media is an addiction.  


Writing for several hours a day can wreak havoc on your waistline. Many writers mindless eat while tapping away on their computers. It’s amazing how quickly that bowl of chips can disappear, especially when you’re basking in the euphoria of watching the words fly across the screen. Also, some writers use food as a treat for completing an article or a chapter in their novel or as an incentive to keep writing.


Guess what? I found an easy solution. Growing up my favorite author was Daniel Handler, never heard of him? What about his pen name Lemony Snicket. Loved his books, enjoyed the Series of Events! I read an article on how he drinks a lot of water and eats a lot of raw carrots while he works. So I will be adapting to this plan.


The trick here is to become vigilant about what you’re putting in your mouth. Chop up some tasty vegetables. Not only will your keyboard stay cleaner but you’ll knock out at least one recommended daily serving of veggies.


Another trick to keeping this healthy is to just say no to fatty dressings. Sprinkle a little salt and pepper on your veggies, or try just a splash of red wine vinegar. For those writers who like a little spice, try using a little green chili powder to dress up your healthy snack.


Life on a diet is rough… especially when your hobby revolves around a chair and keyboard. I mean a Coke Zero is fine, but some really needs to get on the Double Chocolate Milkshake with Extra Whipped Cream and Rainbow Sprinkles Zero.


I’m slowly giving up sugar in my life and it’s getting harder. The coke is gone. The cookie are no more and I still find myself weak to chocolate. I don’t know if you know this or not but sugar is everywhere and it’s as toxic as cocaine. These days we live in a world where everybody wants to shine, but no one wants to polish and it’s hard to get the writing, housework and other chores done. 


Lately I find when the time comes that I need a little inspiration, or a way out of my writer’s block, I go outside. I start cleaning, start moving around anything just to move around and get a fresh perspective. Exercise is the key! Whenever and however you can get it. 


Thankfully I am not the only writer struggling with a case of the munchies at the keyboard! I know that some of you out there feel my pain. It’s true. Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels but it going to take time and work. Likewise nothing feels as gratifying as growing and achieving as a writer. And we all know how long that can take…


Bottom line I want turn my writer’s butt into a better version of its self. Victoria Secret models have the runways covered, so it’s up to me to just be me.


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